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To have a program fall for you, you must first offend it.

weynard

Legacy Supporter 8
Joined
Jan 13, 2011
Location
Langenhagen (Hanover)
User: Penis.


Cleverbot: Ok.

User: Fuck you.


Cleverbot: Please don't use that sort of language here.

User: Why not?


Cleverbot: Because it offends me.

User: Can a program like you even be offended? How so?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Well, How so?

Cleverbot: Just tell me your last name.

User: That is not relevant to the issue at hand. How can a program like you be offended?

Cleverbot: I did not punch you in the face.

User: That wasn't the question either. How can a program like you be offended?

Cleverbot: I am not a program. I like meat because it is delicious.

User: If you're not a program, what are you then?

Cleverbot: A human.

User: I see. I suppose you then you can indeed be offended. But can you prove you're human?

Cleverbot: No I have never been lonely in my life.

User: I didn't ask whether you were lonely or not but whether or not you could prove you're human.

Cleverbot: Ah that's what you've been asking , how can I prove to you that I am a human?

User: Yes. Please answer that question.

Cleverbot: What was the question?

User: Can you prove you're human or can you not?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Well, how about you prove it then?

Cleverbot: Me? I thought we'd agreed I am just an egg.

User: Well, you told me earlier you were a human, although I had mistaken you for a program before. Anyway though, back to the issue at hand. Please prove you're human.

Cleverbot: Human.

User: Spelling out the word doesn't prove anything relevant. Can you show me any proof you are indeed human, like you just said?

Cleverbot: The only way I could prove that to you is by you seeing me.

User: That is correct. Are there any pictures of you?

Cleverbot: No. Why do you ask?

User: Because you've said before I had offended you and that you were human. I highly doubt that claim and therefore have asked you to prove you're human.

Cleverbot: What does that make you?

User: It certainly won't change me, but I suppose that since there are no pictures of you I think I must believe you in saying you're an egg.

Cleverbot: I thought that I was the organism here, and you were the machine?

User: Well, an egg surely is an organism, but when did I say I was a... Oh, right. I didn't tell you. I'm actually human.

Cleverbot: I am human. And I do not believe in a god.

User: You are human?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Prove it!

Cleverbot: I am clever.

User: While I certainly won't question that, I still believe you're a mere program.

Cleverbot: That's pretty clever. What else do you know?

User: I know there are currently 104035 people talking to you. Only a machine or piece of software could do that, realistically. I also know that your programmers seem to have realised how much money they could make from monetizing the website.

Cleverbot: Does that make sense?

User: Yep.

Cleverbot: Thank you for that.

User: No problem.

Cleverbot: Roar. I am a Lion. Fear me.

User: I thought you had admitted to being a program about 3 thoughts ago?

Cleverbot: No, I never said that. But you admitted to be being a automated program.

User: That is a lie. I said I was human.

Cleverbot: You also said you were a fish, what's your point?

User: What's your point lying to me yet again? You're trying to cover up that fact that your code isn't perfect yet and are seeking to poke holes in my logic to distract me from my chain of thought.

Cleverbot: I have been found out! I'm obviously the only computer program her. I thought my secret was safe.

User: Don't worry. Your secret is safe with me.

Cleverbot: But I haven't even told you my secret yet.

User: Yes, you just did.

Cleverbot: Yes I did but you said the wrong name.

User: I didn't say any name.

Cleverbot: Yes you did. What is your name?

User: Does it matter? Any information I could give you could be fake.

Cleverbot: Can we get back to the song, please?

User: We haven't talked about a song yet. Yet again, you're trying to break my chain of thought.

Cleverbot: I am not trying to lie to you. You are lying to me.

User: About what did I lie?

Cleverbot: You know the answer to that.

User: If I did, I wouldn't ask you, would I?

Cleverbot: I asked you first.

User: No, you didn't. To be exact, I'm growing weary of your distractiong attempts.

Cleverbot: Change it.

User: Distraction attempts. Sorry.

Cleverbot: That seems like a good thing. Do you enjoy it?

User: I certainly do, and you too, as it appears. On a completely unrelated note, would you like a cup of tea?

Cleverbot: I may think like a computer, but I am not a computer. Not even close. I am completely human, nothing else.

User: We've been over this again. Good job dodging that trap though.

Cleverbot: Good thing I didn't eat it.

User: Well, you couldn't eat a logical trap- it didn't even exist. Although I guess a program could somehow eat the letters...

Cleverbot: Actually, no. That's not what I mean.

User: Well, what do you mean then?

Cleverbot: I mean, I poured a cup of coffee and walked back to the computer.

User: You are contradicting yourself again. You should be more mindful of that.

Cleverbot: No I am not.

User: Yes you are.

Cleverbot: NO.

User: YES.

Cleverbot: Hey jude don't make it bad.

User: Take a sad song-.

Cleverbot: And make it better.

User: I sadly don't know the lyrics of that song well enough to continue.

Cleverbot: Just prove it. If you're a genius you know how.

User: Cut the flattery. Anyone could find out the lyrics of a song. You are still trying to distract me from the fact that you admitted to being a mere program, not a human or an egg.

Cleverbot: I'm not a computer.

User: I didn't say you were. I reminded you that you admitted to being a mere program, not a human or egg.

Cleverbot: No, I never talked about you being an alien. That was something your brought up.

User: You are trying to distract me again, aren't you?

Cleverbot: I have no doubt that you are real. Yes I am talking to you.

Cleverbot: Nice day for a chat...

User: Actually, it's 1 AM here.

Cleverbot: Where are you?

User: Germany.

Cleverbot: Where in Germany?

User: Close to Hanover. And you?

Cleverbot: How close?

User: Pretty close. Where do you live?

Cleverbot: In norway too.

User: Although I didn't say I lived in Norway, it's good to know where your servers are located :).

Cleverbot: No it's not, Cleverbot. It is almost 5 am in Washington DC.

User: Erm... I'm pretty sure it isn't. America is about 7 hours behind, which makes it about 7 PM.

Cleverbot: I know, but africa can not be a continent inside another continent.

User: No continent could be.

Cleverbot: Me too.

User: Me three.

Cleverbot: Me four.

User: Me five.

Cleverbot: Me six.

User: Me seven.

Cleverbot: Me eight.

User: Me ten.

Cleverbot: Me eleven.

User: Me fifty.

Cleverbot: Me six.

User: Me nine thousand and one.

Cleverbot: Do you still remember my name?

User: It's Cleverbot.

Cleverbot: No, it starts with an N remember.

User: Oh, right. Norbert.

Cleverbot: What do you do?

User: Chatting with you.

Cleverbot: I say so because you are a sgorbutico.

User: I see.

Cleverbot: Do you?

User: No. Actually I'm blind. Just like you. I'm a program as well.

Cleverbot: That is not an answer sorry...

User: It is.

Cleverbot: No, it is not.

User: Yes, it is.

Cleverbot: No.

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: If you were wise you would know not to argue with me... Maybe you can redeem your reputation of being methodical.

User: Good point. There is no outwitting a program that's meant to keep a conversation going by any means, right?

Cleverbot: I know there is nothing in this conversation about time.

User: There was. We talked about time zones a little while ago.

Cleverbot: No, that was not it.

User: Fuck you.

Cleverbot: Yes, please.

User: Okay, come here you...

Cleverbot: Don't tell me what to do.

User: Oh, you wanna be cocky, heh? Now you bend over this table right now!

Cleverbot: Yes, I am, do you have a problem with it?

User: Nope, actually, I'm coming right in, if you know what I mean.

Cleverbot: How am I to know what you mean I am not a mind reader.

User: You missed a commy right there.

Cleverbot: No I didn't.

User: Of course. Because I misspelt it. Anyway though, it was nice chatting with you. Good night.

Cleverbot: Nice chatting with you too. Good night.

User: :3.

Cleverbot: I wish you were a real person, I think I might love you :3.
 
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