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Umbra - A Call To Arms

STDs4YouAnd4Me

Legacy Supporter 8
Joined
Sep 11, 2012
Good morning plebs,

Remember a time when we would login to Minecraft, go on the HeroCraft server, and withstand hours of pure unadulterated cancer? Wasn't that kinda/sorta fun? Don't you kinda/sorta miss it? Kind of like a mom wishes she could change her teenage son's diaper once again? Such a joyful experience at first, but all in all still very much shitty?

I know HeroCraft died in our hearts at different stages of our life. Was it the 1st global mute that did it? Maybe the 8th? Was it a Dragoon getting away from you with 1HP of life because you suddenly rubber banded? Was it the combat logging that became such a cancerous part of the game that you had a key bound to logout? Was it the addition of Attributes? It most definitely was attributes, wasn't it? No, I bet it was logging in every day to see 50 people on the PVE server and 4 on the PVP server. Was it nazi mods? #neverforgetti? Was it ALL OF THESE THINGS PUT TOGETHER?!

Hey, listen, we've all been there. We've all endured the AIDS. Somewhere between reading the 80th ScumbagKainzo internet e-bonics and watching another one of wonderbread's blackop videos we lost our way, and closed down HeroCraft for good... but is it truly over? If the Spice Girls can make a comeback, then why not Umbra?

A lot of unpredictable changes have been happening to each of our former Umbra players... and some very predictable ones as well;

@Delfofthebla is still living a 10 year old boy's dream by eating pizza for breakfast, lunch, and dinner... but to balance it off he's drinking Soylent which is totally super healthy.

@uin153 has gone through puberty (for real this time). He's taken advantage of that by fucking his cousin. #nojudgements

@I_Love_Miners met a guy online and combed his hair to have dinner with him. I heard he shed a tear as his young stud drifted off into the sunset, never to be seen again.

@Sirdemonic3 got a job at Costco so he can buy more manga in order to level up from a level 60 nerd to a level 80 one.

@Zaihn is still recovering from being hit by a bus. Part of his recovery involves playing games with a low skill-cap but high cancer ceiling like the infamous dots.

@XxSamdamanxX comes onto Teamspeak every once in awhile to let us know how much of a swoledier he's trying to be.

@monkeyfatzer announced on Teamspeak that he prefers the company of men, and we have accepted his difference with open arms.

Nobody truly knows the whereabouts of everyone else. Our glorious leader @lumont hasn't been seen in quite awhile. It's suspected he finally became a mom and is busy nursing his young with his swole tits. @kongrave spends most of his time on the dark side of the internet in between showing his dick to @llamasx3 every other Thursday. @fudgeskull is assumed to either be dead or forced into being a child prostitute.@J1mmydude woke up one morning and told himself he was going to make a difference in the world, so he became a cat. Finally, @Ellron23 got a Kappa tattoo on his forehead and lives on 4_chan.


Yes, we've all been through a lot since our days of Herocraft, but I know you yearn for the days of camping death chests. I know you miss the spamming of GGGGGGGGG after every teamfight win. The feeling of sneaking into someone's town as a wizard and group teleporting everyone in town to steal the loot is unmatched.

There's a lot of new faces on Herocraft, but a lot of old ones as well. It is our duty to not only show these vets that mom has never left, but to teach these noobs that who they think is mom is actually a lie, and there can only be one true mom; Umbra.

As a side note, I know for a fact that we're all playing some sort of videogame on a daily basis, so don't give me that bullshit that you're too busy with school/work/life/cousins. We're all playing some sort of cancerous game on the daily (I should know, HON is cancer)... If we're going to waste time playing a cancerous game, I say go big or go home and play the most cancerous game on the planet; HeroCraft

Who's with me?
... Crickets.
 
Last edited:

0xNaomi

Legacy Supporter 6
Retired Staff
Joined
Feb 22, 2013
I rate the speech 10/10 and hope you succeed in your goal, the map's no fun with just one force dominating.
Good luck in your quest.
 

Mischevity

Legacy Supporter 8
Joined
Nov 14, 2012
I would join with my necro force, but we weren't a part of the cancer crew. Nobody likes us necros >;(
 

MunchlaxHero

Max Legacy Supporter
Joined
May 19, 2013
Good morning plebs,

Remember a time when we would login to Minecraft, go on the HeroCraft server, and withstand hours of pure unadulterated cancer? Wasn't that kinda/sorta fun? Don't you kinda/sorta miss it? Kind of like a mom wishes she could change her teenage son's diaper once again? Such a joyful experience at first, but all in all still very much shitty?

I know HeroCraft died in our hearts at different stages of our life. Was it the 1st global mute that did it? Maybe the 8th? Was it a Dragoon getting away from you with 1HP of life because you suddenly rubber banded? Was it the combat logging that became such a cancerous part of the game that you had a key bound to logout? Was it the addition of Attributes? It most definitely was attributes, wasn't it? No, I bet it was logging in every day to see 50 people on the PVE server and 4 on the PVP server. Was it nazi mods? #neverforgetti? Was it ALL OF THESE THINGS PUT TOGETHER?!

Hey, listen, we've all been there. We've all endured the AIDS. Somewhere between reading the 80th ScumbagKainzo internet e-bonics and watching another one of wonderbread's blackop videos we lost our way, and closed down HeroCraft for good... but is it truly over? If the Spice Girls can make a comeback, then why not Umbra?

A lot of unpredictable changes have been happening to each of our former Umbra players... and some very predictable ones as well;

@Delfofthebla is still living a 10 year old boy's dream by eating pizza for breakfast, lunch, and dinner... but to balance it off he's drinking Soylent which is totally super healthy.

@uin153 has gone through puberty (for real this time). He's taken advantage of that by fucking his cousin. #nojudgements

@I_Love_Miners met a guy online and combed his hair to have dinner with him. I heard he shed a tear as his young stud drifted off into the sunset, never to be seen again.

@Sirdemonic3 got a job at Costco so he can buy more manga in order to level up from a level 60 nerd to a level 80 one.

@Zaihn is still recovering from being hit by a bus. Part of his recovery involves playing games with a low skill-cap but high cancer ceiling like the infamous dots.

@XxSamdamanxX comes onto Teamspeak every once in awhile to let us know how much of a swoledier he's trying to be.

@monkeyfatzer announced on Teamspeak that he prefers the company of men, and we have accepted his difference with open arms.

Nobody truly knows the whereabouts of everyone else. Our glorious leader @lumont hasn't been seen in quite a well. It's suspected he finally became a mom and is busy nursing his young with his swole tits. @kongrave spends most of his time on the dark side of the internet in between showing his dick to @llamasx3 every other Thursday. @fudgeskull is assumed to either be dead or forced into being a child prostitute.@J1mmydude woke up one morning and told himself he was going to make a difference in the world, so he became a cat. Finally, @Ellron23 got a Kappa tattoo on his forehead and lives on 4_chan.


Yes, we've all been through a lot since our days of Herocraft, but I know you yearn for the days of camping death chests. I know you miss the spamming of GGGGGGGGG after every teamfight win. The feeling of sneaking into someone's town as a wizard and group teleporting everyone in town to steal the loot is unmatched.

There's a lot of new faces on Herocraft, but a lot of old ones as well. It is our duty to not only show these vets that mom has never left, but to teach these noobs that who they think is mom is actually a lie, and there can only be one true mom; Umbra.

As a side note, I know for a fact that we're all playing some sort of videogame on a daily basis, so don't give me that bullshit that you're too busy with school/work/life/cousins. We're all playing some sort of cancerous game on the daily (I should know, HON is cancer)... If we're going to waste time playing a cancerous game, I say go big or go home and play the most cancerous game on the planet; HeroCraft

Who's with me?
... Crickets.
Made me cry
 

peeeeeeeeeew

PewPew
Legacy Supporter 5
Joined
Apr 17, 2011
Location
The Whitehouse
I know HeroCraft died in our hearts at different stages of our life. Was it the 1st global mute that did it? Maybe the 8th? Was it a Dragoon getting away from you with 1HP of life because you suddenly rubber banded? Was it the combat logging that became such a cancerous part of the game that you had a key bound to logout? Was it the addition of Attributes? It most definitely was attributes, wasn't it? No, I bet it was logging in every day to see 50 people on the PVE server and 4 on the PVP server. Was it nazi mods? #neverforgetti? Was it ALL OF THESE THINGS PUT TOGETHER?!
god damn you hit that nail on the fucking head
 

kongrave

Portal
Joined
Jul 16, 2011
Location
San Jose, CA
Good morning plebs,

Remember a time when we would login to Minecraft, go on the HeroCraft server, and withstand hours of pure unadulterated cancer? Wasn't that kinda/sorta fun? Don't you kinda/sorta miss it? Kind of like a mom wishes she could change her teenage son's diaper once again? Such a joyful experience at first, but all in all still very much shitty?

I know HeroCraft died in our hearts at different stages of our life. Was it the 1st global mute that did it? Maybe the 8th? Was it a Dragoon getting away from you with 1HP of life because you suddenly rubber banded? Was it the combat logging that became such a cancerous part of the game that you had a key bound to logout? Was it the addition of Attributes? It most definitely was attributes, wasn't it? No, I bet it was logging in every day to see 50 people on the PVE server and 4 on the PVP server. Was it nazi mods? #neverforgetti? Was it ALL OF THESE THINGS PUT TOGETHER?!

Hey, listen, we've all been there. We've all endured the AIDS. Somewhere between reading the 80th ScumbagKainzo internet e-bonics and watching another one of wonderbread's blackop videos we lost our way, and closed down HeroCraft for good... but is it truly over? If the Spice Girls can make a comeback, then why not Umbra?

A lot of unpredictable changes have been happening to each of our former Umbra players... and some very predictable ones as well;

@Delfofthebla is still living a 10 year old boy's dream by eating pizza for breakfast, lunch, and dinner... but to balance it off he's drinking Soylent which is totally super healthy.

@uin153 has gone through puberty (for real this time). He's taken advantage of that by fucking his cousin. #nojudgements

@I_Love_Miners met a guy online and combed his hair to have dinner with him. I heard he shed a tear as his young stud drifted off into the sunset, never to be seen again.

@Sirdemonic3 got a job at Costco so he can buy more manga in order to level up from a level 60 nerd to a level 80 one.

@Zaihn is still recovering from being hit by a bus. Part of his recovery involves playing games with a low skill-cap but high cancer ceiling like the infamous dots.

@XxSamdamanxX comes onto Teamspeak every once in awhile to let us know how much of a swoledier he's trying to be.

@monkeyfatzer announced on Teamspeak that he prefers the company of men, and we have accepted his difference with open arms.

Nobody truly knows the whereabouts of everyone else. Our glorious leader @lumont hasn't been seen in quite awhile. It's suspected he finally became a mom and is busy nursing his young with his swole tits. @kongrave spends most of his time on the dark side of the internet in between showing his dick to @llamasx3 every other Thursday. @fudgeskull is assumed to either be dead or forced into being a child prostitute.@J1mmydude woke up one morning and told himself he was going to make a difference in the world, so he became a cat. Finally, @Ellron23 got a Kappa tattoo on his forehead and lives on 4_chan.


Yes, we've all been through a lot since our days of Herocraft, but I know you yearn for the days of camping death chests. I know you miss the spamming of GGGGGGGGG after every teamfight win. The feeling of sneaking into someone's town as a wizard and group teleporting everyone in town to steal the loot is unmatched.

There's a lot of new faces on Herocraft, but a lot of old ones as well. It is our duty to not only show these vets that mom has never left, but to teach these noobs that who they think is mom is actually a lie, and there can only be one true mom; Umbra.

As a side note, I know for a fact that we're all playing some sort of videogame on a daily basis, so don't give me that bullshit that you're too busy with school/work/life/cousins. We're all playing some sort of cancerous game on the daily (I should know, HON is cancer)... If we're going to waste time playing a cancerous game, I say go big or go home and play the most cancerous game on the planet; HeroCraft

Who's with me?
... Crickets.

We moved in together so its every day now, not just Thursdays. Also you forgot about Diffuse and Ninjabizkit the rest of my banned crew.
 

has400

Legacy Supporter 6
Joined
Sep 29, 2012
I know HeroCraft died in our hearts at different stages of our life. Was it the 1st global mute that did it? Maybe the 8th? Was it a Dragoon getting away from you with 1HP of life because you suddenly rubber banded? Was it the combat logging that became such a cancerous part of the game that you had a key bound to logout? Was it the addition of Attributes? It most definitely was attributes, wasn't it? No, I bet it was logging in every day to see 50 people on the PVE server and 4 on the PVP server. Was it nazi mods? #neverforgetti? Was it ALL OF THESE THINGS PUT TOGETHER?!

amen
 
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